They stand among the wreckage of their former clients,
heads shaking.
How could it happen? How could they have misled us? How could we
have missed what was really going on?
Perhaps seeking some relief from the killing fields of recent
corporate failures, last month a group of Certified Practising
Accountants settled down in Sydney to a lunchtime seminar on
international trade with the World Trade Organisation’s Kinnithrung
Sprat.
Sprat had some dramatic news to announce – the WTO’s planned
dissolution in September and its reconstitution as a new Trade
Regulation Organisation, dedicated to assisting the world's poor
instead of the rich.
“The new organisation will have as its basis the United Nations
Universal Declaration of Human Rights, with the aim of ensuring the
TRO will have human rather than business interests as its bottom
line,” Sprat was quoted as saying.
After the initial shock, some of the accountants expressed
enthusiasm for the change, and offered thoughtful suggestions for
how world trade could benefit the poor – moving the TRO headquarters
from Switzerland to a Third World country, for example.
“I’m as right-wing as the next fellow,” said one of the CPAs,
”but it's time we gave something back to the countries we've been
doing so well from.”
Realising the news value, CPA Australia issued a media release
through Australian Associated Press, under the name of NSW
communications manager Barbara McGee, announcing the WTO’s
restructure.
Meanwhile, Canadian MP John Duncan had seen a similar media
release on a website and during question time asked the government
what impact this would have on current trade negotiations.
A confused Pat O'Brien, parliamentary secretary to the trade
minister, responded that Canada would continue to press its cases
before the WTO.
Unfortunately, for both bean-counters and pollies, Kinnithrung
Sprat was not who he purported to be, but was impersonator Andy
Bichelbaum from an anti-globalisation group called the Yes Men.
The Yes Men’s hoaxes involve posing as WTO employees and
presenting information to business meetings around the world that is
contrary to the aims of the real World Trade Organisation.
Bichelbaum recently told the ABC’s Media Report that people
listening to his presentations think that it’s really the WTO
speaking to them.
“This caught us by surprise the first time when we responded to
an invitation to go and speak to a conference of lawyers
specialising in international trade in Salzburg. We expected them to
react to the insane talk that we’d prepared with horror, and either
drum us out of town, put us in jail, at least react. And when they
didn’t and when they didn’t even notice that there was something
fishy going on, we were rather taken aback.”
After one hoax in Finland, a participant said, “But they were so
polite and they had such a large Powerpoint presentation, how could
they possibly be hoaxers?”
"We've already demonstrated that audiences of experts will accept
anything whatsoever so long as it comes from the mouth of the WTO,"
said Mike Bonanno, another Yes Man who helped to prepare the Sydney
lecture.
Bonanno says his group is trying to balance the free trade
debate.
“We simply wanted to present the idea that it is possible and
attainable to create a trading system that is first and foremost
concerned with the welfare of people, rather than the current system
in which profits are the only goal,” he told AAP recently.
So how does it work?
The Yes Men own the Internet URL http://www.crikey.com.au/business/www.gatt.org
which impersonates the WTO’s official site.
Business organisations seeking a speaker from the WTO contact the
Yes Men through the site, often enquiring about the availability of
Mike Moore, the WTO’s Director-General. The Yes Men write back
saying Moore is unavailable and offering an alternative expert
speaker, which is usually accepted and away they go.
Subscribers can find more information about the WTO dissolution
hoax at this web site
including the media release from CPA Australia which apparently ran
on their website for several days before they realised they’d been
had.
You can fool some of the people…
Stuart Mackenzie can be reached at freelancejournalist@bigpond.com
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